I hate flying. I don’t vomit constantly like I did when I was a kid, but it still gives me a really bad migraine and I’m essentially useless for the entire trip (thank heavens for iPods). Regardless, I still like to get into the airport and get my luggage and myself settled with all due haste. It isn’t always easy — especially when choosing your security line is the same roulette wheel as picking what line to stand in at the grocery store. You think you’ve got the most efficient-looking one…and then the guy in front of you has to take off his belt, unpack his laptop and his XBox, remove his cell phone and all the loose change from his pocket, and be reminded to take off his jacket. And on top of that all, his credit card bounced and he forgot his checkbook, and he needs a price check on frozen peas.
So imagine my surprise when I got to the Orlando airport yesterday and the decision had been made for me. Security is now broken up into three sections: Families with Children, Casual Travelers, and Expert Travelers. OH, THANK GOD. I actually waffled back and forth between “casual” and “expert” for half a second…it’s not like I was dressed in a business suit or the regulatory blue shirt and khakis…but I’m a writer. I was wearing my uniform: jeans and a suntan. I decided that if I’ve traveled enough to get a free ticket on Southwest, I’m an expert traveler.
Heck, if I’m the kind of person to look at the new line hierarchy and think OH, THANK GOD, I’m an expert traveler. 🙂