But Griffin Hall totally floored me.

Greg over at Funky Werepig told me during our infamous two-hour-long Valentine’s Day interview that his son Griffin LOVED the book I signed for him back at Horrorfind, so much so that he asked if he could donate another copy to his school library. He also announced that I was one of his Top Three Girlfriends. I was immensely flattered. When I mentioned Friday’s reading at The York Emporium, Greg told me that he was going to bring Griffin to meet me. I was very excited, but then, I’m always excited to meet the fabulous children of my fabulous friends — wouldn’t *you* be curious to know who’s going to take over the world?

But nothing prepared me for the dashing, wide-eyed gentleman in the bright orange jacket who bowed politely and said quite formally, “My good Princess, I am Prince Griffin.”

What does one do to that but blush and curtsy? So I did. “It is an honor to meet you, Prince Griffin. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“I would like to present you with my autograph.” He handed me a fabulous picture of himself, with AlphaOops, at his school library. He bade me turn it over and on the back, he had inscribed a personal message to me.

All you girls reading this take note: It is one thing to be called a Princess — it’s quite another to be treated like one.

Right then and there Griffin Hall stole my heart — though can a thing be stolen if wrapped in pretty bows and given freely? Griffin gave me confidence and made me smile all through my reading…and interview…and subsequent reading…and interview…that was televised and will be running on Channel 16 (? I think it’s 16. I’ll post more details when I have them). The picture of Griffin and me that Jim took has been on the front page of the York Daily Record site for three days now.

I felt fabulous and famous and cherished and special long after the event was over and all my friends and family (I love you Aunt Theda & Uncle Dave & Cousin Alex!) had parted ways for the evening.

This Princess thanks you again, Prince Griffin, for deigning to attend my humble gathering on Friday night, and for making me feel welcome…and wonderful. It is an honor to be one of your Top Three Girlfriends. I wish you lots of love & hugs & happiness.

And you be careful with that Charm. Remember to always use your powers for GOOD.

Our beloeved Maurice was recently interviewed by Jeff Vandermeer about Dark Faith – what started out as a Mo*Con anthology and became something much, much more. I give you leave to click here and check it out.

After all, I started out as “a little girl with a little curl” and look where I am now!

(To preorder Dark Faith, I give you leave to click this link too.)

There was:

One of these things is not like the others /  one of these things just doesn’t belong…

and

One of these things is not like the others / three of these things are kind of the same…

Thanks to iPhones and the magic of Google, we discovered that we were *both* right. (Though yes, technically the first one is righter, but shhh.) And thank goodness, too. No one wants  to threaten Global Thermonuclear War before 8:00 in the morning.

So…which version of the song do you know?

Alethea Kontis: What’s the theme of this antho?

Steven Saus: Timeshares starts with a simple premise:  Where – no, when – would you go if you could go on vacation anywhen in time?

Like most people, I’ve been exposed to lots of time travel stories.  The 19 stories all imagine the time-vacation agency in slightly different ways, which keeps each story in this anthology fresh.  Some stories are action-packed, some are mysteries, and some center on character and emotion.

AK: What’s your story about?

SS: My story, “Memories of Light and Sound” is about a couple on their honeymoon to New York City in the 1920’s.  Anthony hasn’t told his wife everything about why he chose that time, and the impact it will have on his family.

AK: How did you come to be involved in Timeshares?

SS: Jean Rabe invited me to become involved after hearing me read a rough version of “Kicking the Habit” (since published in the anthology Hungry for Your Love) during a Read & Critique session at GenCon.  I left the meeting afterward, holed up with my laptop and some gin, and pounded out the rough draft in about three hours.

AK: Who are some other folks in the book?

SS: There’s many fine authors in this anthology, like Chris Pearson, Kevin J. Anderson, Donald J. Bingle, Robert Vardeman, Mike Stackpole, and Kelly Swails.

AK: What do you like best about anthologies?

SS: I’ve always liked anthologies because at their best – as in Timeshares and Hungry for Your Love–they let authors explore a single theme from a variety of ways.  It’s fascinating to see the ideas and expectations you have to be twisted in fun and interesting ways.  As a reader, I also like them because I can easily devote the time for a short story in my busy life – but a full novel takes a time commitment I can’t always give.

AK: Do you have a favorite anthology?

SS: One of my recent favorites (not counting ones that I’m in) is the anthology Gamer Fantastic.  From Chris Pearson’s powerful opening story “Escapism” to Don Bingle’s funny “Gaming Circle” and Jim C Hines’ “Mightier Than The Sword” all the way through Kristine Kathryn Rusch’s “Game Testing”, it’s a solid anthology with hardly any weak points. Definitely a must-buy for anyone involved with any type of gaming.  That said, I’m also looking forward to A Girl’s Guide to Guns and Monsters, which I haven’t had a chance to get into yet.

AK: If you could be any superhero, who would you be & why?

SS: I’m not sure he counts as a “superhero”, but I identify most with Destruction from The Sandman.  Except that in real life, I’m much more like Dante from Clerks (or the sequel), or Leonard from The Big Bang Theory.  Go figure.

If anyone knows where I can get a vest like Destruction’s in Brief Lives, I would be much indebted.

(Note: Hungry for Your Love is currently in e-book format from Ravenous Romance;  a print version will be available from St. Martin’s press this Halloween.)

Ladies & gentlemen: George & Marcy Kontis — a.k.a Mom & Dad.

From their dance class Christmas party.

But the tower crumbled–as towers do when self-rescuing princesses have access to dynamite–and I made my journey Over the Rainbow. I spent some time healing in Munchkinland before I put on my Big Girl shoes and danced my way here: The Emerald City.

Green always *has* been my favorite color.

There are teenagers here aplenty, but we fly our zombie turtle flag and paint macaroni and raid books out of car trunks. I’ve hung up my purple rollers and pom-poms and tagged along with my tall misfit crew to Dart League Night.

I’m not on the team, of course, but I get to cheer, and give shoulder massages, and play a few games during practice. It’s been a long time since Dave Buchert’s basement but I don’t suck too badly…not like they’d suddenly stop liking me even if I did.

The music’s not as loud here as it is at the rink, and I’ve made some new friends, which is nice. Heck, I almost feel like a grown up! (she said, as she propped her slippers up under the bar table and sipped her Diet Coke full of cherries…)

I think I like this new City. I may stick around for a while…

Look at this picture and tell me I’m wrong:

There’s a snippet of the article here. Bonus points to Charles for using “acci-purposely.” Kontis Sister assimilation is what that is.

It was amusing to actually see what the witch was screaming about the whole time instead of hearing it from where I was hunched over my laptop in the lobby. The set was very well-constructed, and I was impressed how well they dealt with scene changes and full-cast fight scenes — especially when the ratio of children-to-adults onstage far outnumbers that in the audience. I was very impressed by the boy who played Edmund, as well as Mr. Beaver.

And then, of course, there were THE STARS OF THE SHOW:

Morgan (left) was Bertram Bear…a whiny teenager with zero motivation to be snipped from his mother’s apron strings. His promise to never leave her–directly followed by the question”What’s for dinner?” had us rolling. Bertram did perish in the full-cast finale fight scene, but was mercifully brought back to life with Lucy’s healing potion. That’s right, children: at the end of the play Bertram Bear is a ZOMBIE. I know what’s for dinner tonight…

Justin’s crime in Narnia–apart from being the feared Fenris Ulf, head of the witch-queen’s guard, and making all of us lose the game after reading his bio–was a little thing we Thespians like to call STEALING THE SHOW. Sure, the witch screamed and ranted and cackled with a passion that made everyone in the immediate vicinity lose their voices, but it was Fenris’s low growl that made the children gasp and cringe. I would not be surprised if Justin’s Ulf made an appearance in several young nightmares over the past couple of weeks–Peter might have killed Ulf according to the script, but all of us watching knew that had it been a real fight, Ulf would have had Peter’s head…and fed it to Bertram for breakfast.

(Hear me now: The first one to suggest The Lion, The Witch, The Wardrobe, and The Zombie gets banned from the website.)

The show was fun, as all shows should be. It was entertaining and–for community theatre–without flaw. The only grievance I have is with the audience. Dickie and Qwee and Manda & Kram and I had already planned to be the loudest hooters & hollerers in the audience when Justin took his bow. But, as far as I could tell from my seat near the back of the audience, I was the only one who stood.

I wanted to scream WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? It’s the last, sold-out show of the two-weekend run, a cast of mostly children of whom I’d bet a few hundred dollars you know at least three, they did a damn fine job, and you can’t GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF YOUR SEAT to cheer their efforts? Not only are you disappointing the cast, you are setting a TERRIBLE example for the children you’re sitting next to you. I was always taught to applaud the efforts of anyone who had the bravery to stand up in fromt of a bunch of people and perform, no matter how badly they screwed it up (which they DIDN’T). YOU weren’t on that stage. And if you ever had been, you’d know how tough it was, and how much that applause at the end of the show means.

I didn’t care if the stupid people behind me were thinking, “I wish that stupid chubby woman would sit down so I can see.” The play was OVER. And no way was I sitting down or cheering any less.

Good show, Justin & Morgan. I look forward to the next play!

That’s right, York PA’s FIRST FRIDAY event this March 5th will be featuring some spectacular events (see a complete list here), including special appearances at the York Emporium by local poet Barbara DeCesare and yours truly Princess Alethea Kontis! We will be “performing” this night…and I happen to have an almost-finished copy of AlphaOops: H is for Halloween
…so who knows where the mayhem will take us!

ConfectionatelyYours also needs your help deciding on their next cookie — the presence of your honorable taste buds has been requested.

Here’s an awesome Facebook Event page if you’re the sort who’d like to RSVP in order to keep a reminder on your calendar! (And in case you’re interested in going to see Alice in Wonderland afterward…)

And look! Here’s a really sweet flyer in case you’re the sort who likes to print things out in Technicolor and then slap them on people’s windshields…or just slap people with them!

The York Emporium is located at:
343 West Market Street
York, PA, 17401

See you there!